deardiary my teenage bullshit now has a body count

You dont realize
that every time i look at you 
i see something, kind of different

Sometimes i really hate myself.

Because i suck at photography

Because i suck at writing

i just suck all the time

I CAN NEVER BE GOOD ENOUGH

i think i’m leaving.

you know when you make a huge mistake?

and you dont know whether you wish you could take it back or not?

It’s not like anyone actually reads this.

i mean, come on. so why do i bother?

why?

*pauses*

is somebody there?

I’ve never fit in and you make it so harsh. Harsh. I’m Weird. I’m a freak. Because I read at lunch? Because I write? Because I would rather be in a world of mystery and lust and passion than talk to you? Hear your shallow thoughts? Well, its not worth it. And I don’t’ care.

Why can’t you understand?

I don’t want to admit it but I have to

I hate you

You’ve always been rotten

You’ve never been there

I hate you

Never a hand on my shoulder

A pat on the back

I hate you

You have no sweet demeanor

All I see is mean and harsh

I hate you

I wish I didn’t

But the feeling is there

I hate you